Who’s the Boss?

I was reading a magazine and the article was discussing the family and the role each one plays for it to be successful. It spoke of how parents have to not be afraid to parent. Albeit, parenting is a challenging job, but in some households, the kids run the show and the parents take on a subservient role.

Maybe parents want to be their kids friend and as long as they are not doing anything illegal, then some parents seem to tolerate unacceptable behavior. They are afraid to parent and set rules.

The article went on to say, and I love this thought, a “family should not be run as a democracy, as if the parents’ right to enforce rules were somehow dependent upon the children’s approval.”

It makes you think…..I would love to know your opinion on why, in some cases, the tables have turned.

Monkeying Around

I just want to know what am I smoking?* First let me start off by saying I’m exhausted. I don’t get enough sleep because I’m always doing something. I also blame my computer for being so darn attractive. I think the internet was created by Satan himself, just to distract people. Okay I’m way off topic with this post.

Last night after my daughter and I finished reading to each other and it was time for her to go to bed, she went to look for her stuffed monkey, Max. Max gets around. He has been on car tips, vacations, airplanes, sleepovers, in fact, I’m almost sure he has more frequent flyer miles than any monkey I know. I’m sure at some point, we will need to get this monkey his own passport.

Well Sunday night, my daughter stayed at her aunt’s house and of course, Max went with her. Well guess what? Max did not come home last night, he must be out there monkeying around. (In my mind: Uh Oh!) My sister does not live around the corner anymore, she’s an hour away, round trip, on one of New Jerseys most suicidal highways, Route 22! There are so many things going through my mind because I really don’t want to make the trip, so I tell her that we will get him and not to worry. Now, I’m waiting to exhale because in my mind, I’m thinking the weekend.

“But I’ve never slept without Max before. What if he’s being elbowed and rolled on.” she says.

Bomb drop! I already know what I have to do.

I call my sister. I can’t ask her to put Max on the phone to ask him if he’s alright, so I tell her that Victoria left her monkey and to please put him in a safe place. She sympathizes and asks to speak to her assuring her that Max would not be hurt.

After I hung up the phone, I say I can’t believe I’m actually going to drive that long way to pick up a monkey. This makes her laugh a little and we pick out surrogate stuffed animal to fill in for Max.

The things you do for your kid(s). I don’t know what I’m smoking, but I do know what I will be drinking, after we get back, of course.

*I’m a non-smoker, guess I just like my lungs pink!
Proofreading by Maxine, the Editor

EDIT 10/11/07 here’s a picture of Max:

What Exactly is The American Dream?

The term was first used by James Truslow Adams in his book The Epic of America which was written in 1931. He states: “The American Dream is “that dream of a land in which life should be better and richer and fuller for everyone, with opportunity for each according to ability or achievement. It is a difficult dream for the European upper classes to interpret adequately, and too many of us ourselves have grown weary and mistrustful of it. It is not a dream of motor cars and high wages merely, but a dream of social order in which each man and each woman shall be able to attain to the fullest stature of which they are innately capable, and be recognized by others for what they are, regardless of the fortuitous circumstances of birth or position.”

Gee, I don’t know how this translation got lost over time, but this is not The American Dream most people are familiar with. The American Dream is a house, a lot of money, a nice car and another nice car, a spouse, 2.5 kids all enclosed in a white picket fence and a dog. Sadly, this is what many Americans are in pursuit of. Not too many people are thinking of social order and equality. It’s the “I Gotta Get Mine Syndrome”, the appearance of “I’m doing well” or “Look at me, I made it”, regardless of what it really costs.

Take for example, a home. One of my favorite financial guru’s always says, a home can either be a curse or a blessing. If you don’t have the money to maintain a home, it will be a curse. If you save your money, put a 20% down payment, then it should be blessing.

The American Dream sounds good, but in reality, that’s all it is, a dream. It may even be somebody else’s dream. I’m certainly not buying into what people think I should have. All of those things mentioned above is great. Everyone deserves their own home, nice things, a great salary, but not at the expense of self-destruction. Have a seat, think about what YOU really want and then go for it, but not before calculating the costs.

A quote from a magazine I read: “The more we want to do something (fill in the blank) the more likely we are to make unchecked assumptions and pay attention only to the data that tells us what we want to hear.”

My dream is to be debt free before the end of ‘07.

Recommended Reading:
Cashing in on the American Dream
BLACK WALLSTREET - A Lost Dream