Fat and Happy?

Last Wednesday I received an email from a friend with two photos attached of a former NBA player’s ex-wife, comparing her weight 20 years ago to now. I guess her weight gain was supposed to be a joke because there was a “funny” caption underneath the photos about what may have happened to her settlement.  I replied, “She could go to the gym since she doesn’t have to work,¹ but she looks fine.”

A few minutes later my friend replied, “Maybe she doesn’t want to go to the gym she might be quite comfortable just the way she is. There are a lot of people out there who are just fine with themselves but magazines, other people, TV, make them feel bad about their size.”

Fair enough.

I don’t doubt she’s happy or even comfortable; I just assume she would prefer to be a smaller size. I know being fat is not always about overeating, there are other factors (e.g. medical, emotional or psychological) that contribute to weight gain. Who knows what her reasons are yet we still judge or comment.

The issue of weight, especially for a woman, is a touchy subject and is not about the weight but the desire to feel wanted, accepted and loved. It seems socially acceptable to make fun of fat people because no one cares about their feelings.  “Fat people know that the first impression that others have of them may be negative. This leads to low self-esteem and shame.”

Not fair.

Losing weight is hard work, it’s not easy! Some people are choosing happiness over body size and have embraced the Fat Acceptance Movement, whose goal is to “change societal attitudes toward individuals who are fat.” I first read about fat acceptance on Kim’s blog over @ FatHappyGirl and I was moved by what she wrote below:

I think an important part of fat acceptance is really understanding what fat acceptance is. It’s personal, it’s not the same way for everyone. It isn’t just about being fat, it’s wanting to be treated equally and fairly. It’s about not wanting to be judged on being fat. It’s about being treated kindly because we are another human being. It means being free of assumptions and half truths. It means being judged less and loved more.

I’m trying to lose several pounds this year with the help of friends/family, my Wii Fit, cutting back² on junk food, making healthier food choices, portion control and regular exercise. Not everyone trying to lose weight wants to be a size 3 either, but a size comfortable.

I am not happy my clothes don’t fit anymore. I am not comfortable with my bulge, but I am a happy person. There are days when I dream of Frisbee sized cookies and days when my eyes are on the prize.  Can you be fat and healthy? Well there’s a bewildering array of conflicting opinions on the subject, but most of the studies I read said no. A few of them said yes. Can you be fat but happy? Absolutely!

So, what did I mean by my comment?  I’ve never heard anyone say they’re overweight because they want to be.  Either they don’t have the time to exercise or the money to buy nutritious foods. If someone is well off financially, to me that represents opportunity and freedom. Why wouldn’t someone use these tools to their physical advantage.

Later I apologize to my friend if I offended her with my comment, that’s never my intention, same goes with this post.  A person’s size would not prevent me from befriending or treating them with respect.  I do think it’s unfair that a person’s “worth”, especially a woman, is measured in pounds, that’s a heavy burden to bear almost more than the weight itself.

1. I’ll explain [↩]
2. not eliminating [↩]

Calling All Bloggers!

If you are a blogger, chances are you are a person of great stamina, creativity, spontaneity, always looking for new angles to freshly display your repertoire. You take great pleasure in doing it everyday.

Then there may be times when you are lackadaisical, predictable and you find yourself simply going through the motions just because…..

So I am proposing a challenge! I call it the 1/100 post. You have to create a post with a one word title using 100 words (or less). You have to get in there, make your point and get out!

The post should have an interest-arousing introduction, a main thought and a motivating conclusion.

Now why did I come up with this? Well it’s different (and no one else has) and if you find that you have bloggers block, then writing under restrictions may liven things up a bit. It could open up your mind to try new things, to see differently, to write differently, to think differently.

Sometimes less is more. So strip your lengthy post naked and show me what you don’t have, quickly. Post a link to your 1/100 as a comment here if you are up to the challenge.

This lengthy post was totally unnecessary and I’ve already completed my 1/100. I’ll post it on Saturday.

The Question Behind the Question

Okay this post is for the whiners, the cry babies, the complainers and for all the people out there who are always pointing the finger at others, you know who you are, this book is for you!

This is a free plug for the book QBQ! The Question Behind the Question: Practicing Personal Accountability in Work and in Life,* a book I first heard about on the Dave Ramsey show. It teaches people to ask the right questions and what you can do personally to eliminate blame, complaining and procrastination.

Instead of asking Who’s going to solve the problem, QBQ teaches you to ask How can I be apart of the solution?

When we stop blaming others or complaining about what’s wrong we put ourselves in a position to bring about solutions. With self-examining questions, this book helps you to focus on personal accountability and what YOU can do to make something better.

*You can peek instead this book by following the link above.